My Boys are NOT “my whole world” or “my everything.” I see many moms posting about their kids being their “main man” or “my whole world.” Don’t get me wrong. I LOVE my boys more than I ever thought I could. My problem with being consumed by my boys is that I am a follower of Christ, and as such, my main priority is to lay my life down and serve Him. As much as I fight it, I am to die to my selfish and sinful desires and serve Him, wholeheartedly. I’ve struggled a lot with this lately. What does it mean to be the one nurturing and raising my kids, hand in hand with my husband, and to put my relationship with Christ first? It is so easy in a Pinterest, Instagram, and Facebook world to be obsessed with my kids and my role as mom. Who doesn’t want to look good? Who doesn’t feel great when our kids are cute, have honorable accomplishments, etc.? But know your main priority. I’ve seen so many women who are struggling with their marriage, their identity and their purpose in life because their priorities are skewed.
Ladies, let’s address our role as Christians. Please, understand I am imperfect. I have my off days, and I am, like everyone, a sinner in need of my Savior. In Matthew 10 Jesus is sending out His disciples to spread the gospel to other towns, and He is giving them a few guidelines to follow. He warns them they will have hard times because they are his followers, so He gives them instructions. First He tells them to proceed without fear. (Another one of my favorite parenting topics I will elaborate on another day). Then in Verse 37 He shakes up many assumptions and says, “Whoever loves his father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me.” This passage struck me today. Do I love my family more than Jesus? If you asked me this question a few months ago, looking at the way I was living my life would have exposed that Jesus was not my priority. But God, in His loving mercy, recently refocused my heart and called me to place Him first again. Apparently, this is an important message because Scripture concerning loving the Lord our God with all our heart, soul, and mind appears multiple times. I’ve seen people who have been in ministry for decades start to love something more than Jesus and it LITERALLY wrecked their life.
The sad truth is this- someday these adorable little monsters whose world revolves around me, won’t depend on me anymore, and the realization of that, if my priorities are not in order, will likely crush me. But it does not have to crush me.
I have one main priority in every season of lie – To serve the Lord my God with all my heart, soul and mind.
Then, as I keep Christ in the center, He will give me different callings to love and serve according to my season in life and according to His will.- My marriage- My children- My extended family- My church- My neighbor- Etc.
So, how do we refocus to the correct priority so that we love God more than our kids? The following is my journey to placing Christ first in my life:
GET INTO HIS WORD. I just finished reading through a One Year Bible plan in about 18 months. I know it isn’t possible for everyone to read through the entire Bible every year because every season of life is different. I am so thankful we serve a God who doesn’t judge us comparing us to other people’s accomplishments. If that were the case, I would fall short 100 times over. Maybe for you, it looks more like reading for 10 minutes a day, whatever you can get done in that time, or read a psalm and a proverb a day. But please, in whatever amount you can, get into the Word of God, and watch your focus and your priorities shift to the things of God.
PRAY. I don’t have a prayer closet, nor do I consider myself to be a “prayer warrior,” but I understand the importance of prayer. I pray for my kids all the time. Sometimes it’s more of a plea to God to help me in the midst of toddler struggles, but a lot of times it is a genuine heartfelt prayer that God would guide and protect them, and that they would come to know Him at a young age and follow Him. I do a ton of praying that God would guide us as parents and give me the confidence I need in Him to be the best mom I can be. I pray for my marriage, and for my husband.
TAKE A BREAK. Sometimes we all just need to step back from the internet, our phones, and the insanity we have come to accept as normal and focus on God’s creation and how blessed we truly are. One of the disciplines that help me keep my life in perspective is to regularly walk away from facebook, Pinterest, news articles, and friends who are constantly comparing where our kids are at in life. Even when being careful, sometimes a “media fast” is what I need to refocus.
The bottom line is this, as Christ-following mommas, our kids should not be our whole world. They may be our main job, and our responsibility, but please for the sake of your family, your marriage, and your sanity put Christ first in every way. Love your kids, parent them well, but don’t neglect your other callings. Remember your call to your church, your marriage, etc. and above all, don’t neglect your principle mission, your relationship with Christ. I pray that I am a well rounded, healthy, Christ serving example for my kids.